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Recovery and Rehabilitation

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Some thoughts on recovery

The other day it occurred to me how snuffing out the fear of life was like removing a blindfold that had kept me from seeing my own life clearly, and this recovery process has largely been about getting accustomed to my new eyesight which filters out much less of what is going on. It is not all that different from other changes I've gone through in the past.

The difference seems merely the scope of it. Normally only a part of or some parts of the environment change, but following the looking the whole world is new. Adjusting to new conditions happens all the time only that most changes are so small that they don't, or barely, catch my attention and they often happen without my involvement. But every now and then something major happens, like a big separation, someone close dies, or a relocation to new town etc., things which can leave me confused and miserable for a while until I get back my footing in the new circumstances. It's natural that more substantial changes are harder and take longer before I feel normal again. Whatever happens though sooner or later I always find myself head up feet down, limbs in place, feeling the same as I always did, but in a slightly new situation and one or two experiences wiser. This thing doesn't seem so different to that after all. What occurred to me is that despite all the colorful images shoved in my face suggesting I do this or that, recovering from the fear feels very much like the same old familiar process of getting used to life after some significant change, and that it really doesn't have to be any more complicated than that.

So to anyone going through tough times: if you aren't already doing focused attention practice begin immediately. It comes with many benefits but perhaps most relevant is that it increases your brain's capacity to adapt to new circumstances, so you can shorten the time it takes before it's over. I trust it will be the same in the end either way though. You will get comfortable in your new shoes eventually, just like you would start dating again after a painful breakup, even though it might have seemed impossible at first.

Some more thoughts on recovery

Another idea recently presented itself that I'd like to scribble down. This is a thought other people have shared here before, and one that I have believed to be the case too, and even argued for because of its logical appeal. This time I want to report it only because it came to me directly, so I might reiterate what it looks like from over here. And that is that sanity strikes us immediately with just one look. The recovery period is not something real, in the way that sanity is real. Recovery is not an event that happens, it is only the name given to a period of time after just one look in which the pervasiveness of sanity is not believed to be experienced because the fog of fear is still thick. That does not mean we are not sane humans already, technically speaking. Up until now I have held other speculations. That was the scribble, cheers.

Yes!!!!!!!!

Ha! Well there's an encouraging response smily Thanks Carla!

Yep! That understanding dawned on me this morning after my morning SDA. I'm very happy with progress during the recovery period, accepting the pain (and accepting resisting the pain!) as part of the growing in understanding. But I finally got that point today, and Roed, your post supports it, that the struggling part is still in the realm of the mind, that the real me (words are tricky) is outside all this, so continuing to fight tooth and nail with issues is probably just more time wasted on the hamster wheel of fear, going nowhere. No blame, it's all too easy to forget what we got when we first had that tiny glimpse or inkling of ourselves and get sucked back into tilting at windmills, it's obvious I still do. It will all work out, though, and again, our real us/me isn't hurt or helped by any of it and when it's over it's over.

Yep! That understanding dawned on me this morning after my morning SDA. I'm very happy with progress during the recovery period, accepting the pain (and accepting resisting the pain!) as part of the growing in understanding. But I finally got that point today, and Roed, your post supports it, that the struggling part is still in the realm of the mind, that the real me (words are tricky) is outside all this, so continuing to fight tooth and nail with issues is probably just more time wasted on the hamster wheel of fear, going nowhere. No blame, it's all too easy to forget what we got when we first had that tiny glimpse or inkling of ourselves and get sucked back into tilting at windmills, it's obvious I still do. It will all work out, though, and again, our real us/me isn't hurt or helped by any of it and when it's over it's over.

Yep! That understanding dawned on me this morning after my morning SDA. I'm very happy with progress during the recovery period, accepting the pain (and accepting resisting the pain!) as part of the growing in understanding. But I finally got that point today, and Roed, your post supports it, that the struggling part is still in the realm of the mind, that the real me (words are tricky) is outside all this, so continuing to fight tooth and nail with issues is probably just more time wasted on the hamster wheel of fear, going nowhere. No blame, it's all too easy to forget what we got when we first had that tiny glimpse or inkling of ourselves and get sucked back into tilting at windmills, it's obvious I still do. It will all work out, though, and again, our real us/me isn't hurt or helped by any of it and when it's over it's over.

Yep! That understanding dawned on me this morning after my morning SDA. I'm very happy with progress during the recovery period, accepting the pain (and accepting resisting the pain!) as part of the growing in understanding. But I finally got that point today, and Roed, your post supports it, that the struggling part is still in the realm of the mind, that the real me (words are tricky) is outside all this, so continuing to fight tooth and nail with issues is probably just more time wasted on the hamster wheel of fear, going nowhere. No blame, it's all too easy to forget what we got when we first had that tiny glimpse or inkling of ourselves and get sucked back into tilting at windmills, it's obvious I still do. It will all work out, though, and again, our real us/me isn't hurt or helped by any of it and when it's over it's over.

Yep! That understanding dawned on me this morning after my morning SDA. I'm very happy with progress during the recovery period, accepting the pain (and accepting resisting the pain!) as part of the growing in understanding. But I finally got that point today, and Roed, your post supports it, that the struggling part is still in the realm of the mind, that the real me (words are tricky) is outside all this, so continuing to fight tooth and nail with issues is probably just more time wasted on the hamster wheel of fear, going nowhere. No blame, it's all too easy to forget what we got when we first had that tiny glimpse or inkling of ourselves and get sucked back into tilting at windmills, it's obvious I still do. It will all work out, though, and again, our real us/me isn't hurt or helped by any of it and when it's over it's over.

Yep! That understanding dawned on me this morning after my morning SDA. I'm very happy with progress during the recovery period, accepting the pain (and accepting resisting the pain!) as part of the growing in understanding. But I finally got that point today, and Roed, your post supports it, that the struggling part is still in the realm of the mind, that the real me (words are tricky) is outside all this, so continuing to fight tooth and nail with issues is probably just more time wasted on the hamster wheel of fear, going nowhere. No blame, it's all too easy to forget what we got when we first had that tiny glimpse or inkling of ourselves and get sucked back into tilting at windmills, it's obvious I still do. It will all work out, though, and again, our real us/me isn't hurt or helped by any of it and when it's over it's over.

 

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