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A month later...

Hi there,

My name is Dawn S. White, I'm 66 years old, and I live in Washington, NJ. I first wrote here a few weeks ago to say I had joined the Lookers.

Well, I'm a real looker now, I have to say. Because even though at first I had my doubts, I really tried hard to place my attention on the sense of me. And I did it as if my hair was on fire — and within a very short time, the Looking starting looking all by itself — I wasn't doing it anymore.

Now I realize that I often notice it looking out of my eyes, and sometimes, if the energy I'm feeling around me is nervous, tense, negative, I focus my awareness on me again, and I can sense, feel, and experience life from this space of my own presence.

For over 30 years I've tried to offer classes, healing sessions, etc. based in whatever work I was doing at the time, to help people, to wake them up, to heal them -- and none were successful. I felt as if I was flailing around — I didn't have the answer for myself, the answer wasn't in the work I was doing, so I went deeper, into silent inquiry, into the work of Nisargadatta and Ramana and current teachers of that ilk. I stopped teaching, sharing, stopped everything. I just sat in silence. I went to a lot of silent retreats, and I loved not talking. But after a few years, even these paths ran dry — and then up came a huge rage against it all. A few months after the total defeat at trying to find something, John and Carla appeared with their message: Just One Look.

Thanks to you guys, about 4 weeks ago I became aware of my own presence -- to what I thought was the pinnacle of my life (b/c for many years, this was all I ever cared about_: enlightenment, open awareness, etc.) to find a deepened compassion for humanity, a deepening feeling of communion with the suffering of human beings, and a feeling of a call to do more.

Being in this body, and experiencing my own presence, I've been noticing a lot of things lately, I trust John in that he says these phenomena will come up and out of our system, so, trusting in that, I'll put them here, just in case someone else has an experience with it that they could share:

I get the shivers. I've had this all my life when I feel simpatico with someone else, but (this happens from time to time) when I turn my attention to me — I feel a chill wash over my body. I don't have any problem with this, but I wanted to mention it.

I hear myself saying, Awwww! a lot — I notice it seems I feel someone is in distress, or needs support, or feels weak at the time. One person said to me, Oh no, I'm OK with that, when I said Awwww… and that's when I first noticed it.

Some longstanding issues with my body are arising - pain in my body in various places and a depression that have been there for years, except now I am able to look while they are happening. I can have the physical issues, have the depression, and still look. In the onslaught of issues, I just keep looking.

And I am now able to speak up for myself, to be my own advocate, to stand more firmly in my own shoes, something I have not been able to do before. And I am amazed by how much more skillful I am in resolving the problems that arise.

That's it for now.

Thank you all for being there, and I'd appreciate hearing of your experiences with the phenomena once you began seeing yourself too.

with love,

Dawn

Dawn:

I just wanted to say thank you. Your open warm heart comes through in what you say. It is wonderful to hear about the experience of people who recognize the key to the kingdom.

Love to you.

David

So happy to share your experiences here Dawn. You give a very good report! I live in Denver with my wife JoAnn and am just getting into the forum aspect of this work. What a pleasure to realize there are quite a bunch of other people pursuing this road. I've been at it about 4 months, my copy of 'Look at yourself' is never far from my side and has been underlined in many MANY places. A short report would be this:

Sometimes really unhappy, painful feelings, a feeling of being alone and abandoned among them, come up with great intensity. But over and above and shining through my life right now is a terrific sense of exhilaration that the wisdom of life has once again gently guided me in my path and introduced me to this extraordinary concept of looking at myself directly.

I want to send loving greetings to you. Just been watching the Macy thanksgiving parade.

Dear David,

Thank you for your kind message -- I can feel the generosity of your heart and am so happy to see your words and feel the connection we share.

With love,

Dawn

Dearest Happy,

It is so great to hear that you and I are connected by our inner looking. I know what you mean about underlining your copy of "Look at Yourself." Instead of reading, I am listening ... I have downloaded all of John's available podcasts and I listen to them all day long! It really helps me to hear his words over and over -- and it helps to "tape over" my "old tapes" with the sanity of looking.

I'm so happy to hear your report and I send you many thanks for sharing it with me. It is beautiful to hear. This is the way I know we can change the world ... one person at a time with "Just One Look."

I was traveling this year and missed the Macy Thanksgiving Parade, and seeing that you'd been watching it while writing this made me so happy! It made up for missing it.

Thank you again Happy. (And I love your name!)

Dawn

 

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