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Hi John,

First of all I must say I don't do the Looking much anymore. I spoke to you on an open house about that and you pretty much cleared that situation for me. There are occasions still where I do pause and take notice but these are becoming few and few and far between. It feels good but certainly not done with the fervour of a "man with his hair on fire" which is a great relief to me.

All other practices seemed to have this desperation to them which finally became just an obstacle.

I have been a practicing poet for some twenty or more years now and for a long time it was tangled up with stories about who I was or wanted to become which I see now actually got in the way of writing well. Then there came a time, some 3 months or so where the desire to write or even any thought of it just vanished. To my surprise I was actually quite relieved. "Whew. I don't have to do that anymore."

But then upon hearing a song by a friend of mine the words suddenly rushed back into my head. It was like a dam breaking.

And I have been writing ever since but in a very different tone. I say this partly to encourage one of your members, a sculptress I believe who found she couldn't sculpt anymore. (I believe I have it right.) It might come back or it won't.

There may come a day when I find my life is sufficient and writing is extraneous. At this point in time however I don't believe that to be the case.

Writing thrives on the world that is forever in flux and movement. That is what writing is about and the closer you are to it the better it becomes. I am witness to this. You say one becomes more adept once this neurosis is gone and I can from my own experience, assure you that is the case. I have seen it in what I write and the way I write and in my own day to day existence.

Writers are a curious lot. They create a world to avoid this one in a way. There is a curious paradox here. One needs the very thing one is trying to avoid. Typical of the illness, no?

So it goes on but I thank you for the great support you offer. As for the looking, I have not much to say about it. I can only encourage people to TRY IT. Everything you say about this wonderful thing will happen. EVERYTHING.

Bless you my friend,

Antony

This is great news, Antony.

Just one question: in what way is the writing not within your life?

Reply

Hi John,

Just to clarify, I don't think there was ever a time when writing was not in my life but as these defenses and walls come down and you are free to sense the wildness of life this finds its way into the writing.

My relationship to this practice has changed as have many relationships in day to day life. I feel more intimate with life, closer to it and this seems to have affected the way I write. Before I felt as if I were on the outside looking in, the constant observer. That feeling is pretty much gone now. It tend to go on and on. Hope I haven't made it seem more complicated than it is.

Thanks for responding

All the best to you both,

Antony

"the world that is forever in flux and movement"

Spending some time today to read forum sharings that I missed..wow so interesting,we are all so unique yet we share this common ground..

I've always shied away from anything like expressing myself through writing so in the past I would probably not post on the forums...I had so many fears around anything artistic, my brother was an amazing writer and I adored him .When I first heard John speak I was very captivated by his language and ability to express what deep in me I knew to be true..then he would say..something like "I want to express this in plain English" and I would relax.. Reuniting with myself has opened so many doors to expressing my life however I feel is me..gone is the feeling of being a certain way... it really is beside the point and I move in this world with so much more ease.

Maureen

 

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