Just One Look Forum Archives

Hi John,

I'm just sitting here wishing I had something useful to contribute in the way of comments, reports but it's hard for me to get back to a place where any words would really seem meaningful or important. I used to write poetry and so there was a point where words were everything but that just fell away as you have said might happen. None of that caused me any distress. In fact it was somewhat of a relief. As you have said and as I have experienced most creative endeavours seem to involve suffering and when that crazy notion about the need to suffer for your art vanished that was the end of that.

I have little recollection of how things were when I started this work although I know there were some pretty disturbing moments along the way. In fact absolutely dreadful would be a better way of putting it but none of that seems left. In fact it's hard to get back to any moment in my life and feel bad or sad or angry about it although I know there have been many rough times. Actually it's hard to get a sense of anything having happened at all, in the sense of the dramatic, even tragic aspect of it all.

The most I can say is to encourage people strongly to stick with you, listen to podcasts (which were and are an enormous help to me.There's no way I could have done this alone.) I have no desire to head for the hills though I must say I do treasure moments of solitude even more now that I don't have to "hideout" as a way of life. Maybe you could assure me that I'm not in some "dissociative state" here or have lost it completely but my sense of it is that's it's all real.

Thank you both for having offered this work the way you have.

Hope to talk to you soon,

Antony

It was a pleasure to read this Anthony, thank you!

Mike H.