Just One Look Forum Archives
Using the Just One Look Method
From what I've noticed, there seem to be quite a few people out there coming to the realization that we can turn our attention away from certain thoughts or emotions and simply get on with doing something else. I'm reading a little book by a well known blogger in which he states: "I don't let my Thinking Mind control me. I defuse from my emotions. When I feel fear, I consciously choose to act despite it." Of course this isn't exactly what we're learning here, but it's definitely different from meditating to try to "empty the mind." As this author points out, it's possible to get control over constantly shifting thoughts as long as we keep at it. But, he points out, these thoughts and emotions will never go away.
That's where JOL differs with this guy's opinion. What's lacking in his approach is, of course, knowledge of the fear of life and the looking that destroys it. Without the definitive action of the looking, you can ignore thoughts and emotions until you're blue in the face, but you won't make a whole lot of progress. So, if this is true for this fellow's method, then it's also true of SDA. Without the looking, SDA is nothing more than a coping mechanism.
The reason I'm bringing this up is because of our recent emphasis on SDA and the many conversations here about it. The looking isn't mentioned much anymore, because we do it once and that's it, unless we decide to take a look every now and then. But it's that first look that does the job. This is true, but I have to admit that I've found an occasional look, or even contemplating for a minute what the looking is, and who this "me" is, has been very helpful in moments of extreme difficulty during the recovery period. If I just sit with that for a minute, it has a definite calming effect and makes it easier to do SDA or whatever else I happen to be doing. By the way, this is not to denigrate SDA in any way, since I consider it to be an extremely valuable and essential tool.
I've recently completed my first year of JOL...I'll try to write a report soon. Love to all...
I still look occasionally also......looking forward to your report!
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