We offer an extremely simple method that will rid you of the root cause of your dissatisfaction with life, and the painful yearning for peace and fulfillment that seems never to be fully satisfied.
We promise you that if you will just try to do what we suggest here, you will succeed. In time, your relationship with your own life will change forever. You will continue to grow in sanity, clarity and effectiveness in your relationship to the circumstances of your life. You will find ever-deepening satisfaction and a clearer understanding of what it really means to be human.
Our method is the result of seventeen years of experience working with people all over the world who have seen their relationship with their own lives change dramatically for the better.
Move the focus of your attention away from this text for a moment and place it on the feel of your breath as it moves in and out of your body through your nose.
Focus on the sensation it causes as it passes across the flesh of your nostrils on the way out. You may find it easier to do this with your eyes closed.
Take 1 minute now to try this for yourself, and then return here and continue reading.
You can see from what you just did that it is relatively easy to direct your attention and focus it on any sensation you choose.
Now, in the same way that you directed your attention to the feeling of your breath in your nostrils, move the focus of attention inward, looking for the faint sensation of what it feels like to be you. What you would call me.
What you are looking for here is the simple me-ness of you. Not the thoughts or the emotions rise and fall within you, or any ideas about your nature that you have heard or read about.
You are always here. Everything else—thought, emotion, sensation—comes and goes in you.
This simple act of inward looking at your me-ness, the sensation that you would call me, automatically dissolves the background of anxiety, distrust and dissatisfaction that is the experience of life for most of us.
Start a daily practice of the Self-Directed Attention Exercise that we recommend immediately. This exercise is fundamental to develop your control over your attention. Control of your attention is the only tool you have that allows you to have a say in the way your life unfolds.
In the next few days or weeks, you may experience relief, lightness, and a sense that all is really well. After that, there may be a period of confusion and psychological difficulty, in which old patterns of thought and behavior reappear.
There is plenty of support available on our website and many people in our discussion forums who can help you put what is happening to you in context, and guide you in developing your own understanding and your skill at navigating this entirely new relationship with life that will begin to take shape.
Please keep in touch and let us know how this unfolds for you. The best way to do this is to post in the forums.
When I was a child I was not happy because I had very strict parents who robbed me of all my freedom. I was a very freedom-loving boy and I felt so totally restricted in a family that never could and never would understand me. There was a lot of psychological cruelty handed out to me by my father and a hell of a lot of bullying I was subjected to by the other kids. I came from a very rough part of London called Peckham, and I was an extremely sensitive young lad.
When I grew up, I married a beautiful Australian girl named Vera, who is still my beloved wife after fifty years. We emigrated to Australia, and after about three months, I decided to join the army, and I volunteered to go to Vietnam, so I could pay back the kindness that the Australians had shown me by receiving me in their beautiful country.
I served in Vietnam for about nine and a half months, then they decided to ship me back to Australia because of injuries and illness. When I came back, my troubles all started, and I developed PTSD, even though I had not really been in much danger during my days of war. I was filled with a terrible anxiety, and was absolutely terrified of both life and death. I had these periods of deep, deep dread that completely ruled my life. I was angry most of the time, and I detested everybody I ever met, with a vengeance so hard to understand.
This got worse and worse as the years proceeded, and I tried everything to control it, from counseling to reading every kind of self-help books, and I read every religion, and all the stuff by so many different spiritual teachers, until I had a bookcase brim-filled with all the books I had read. I tried every kind of meditation, plus yoga, tai chi, and many other things. However, nothing worked. They helped a bit but not enough to stop the ugly terror I felt.
Then, one day, I came across a man named John Sherman on the net, who has helped so many people, and thousands of people now practice what he advocates with much success.
John told me that all I had to do was close my eyes and look at the me-ness of me, it was as simple as that. At first I laughed at him, with his simplistic approach to gaining back one's sanity. But I was desperate; I had walked out on my wife for a year and given everything I had away. My anger was getting worse and worse, and when I finally came back to my family, I really wasn't worth being with. My wife tolerated me because she loved me so totally, but I could tell that I was leading her into psychological, physical illness.
So I gave John's method a try. I meditated every day using my me-ness as a meditation point. I don't mean my thoughts or sensations, emotions or such. I mean the 'me', the part of me that actually runs the show. The 'me' that always seems hidden but is always there in the background. I noticed some changes in me very quickly, but then the progress became slower, but very steady. Now I have been doing this for nearly five years, and the difference in me is phenomenal. I am so happy now, that I could almost scream with joy. I have no more anxiety, and the dread that once debilitated me is totally gone.
My neurotic fear of death has faded. And although I don't want to die, when it comes, I will be totally ready for it. My life is so beautiful these days and everything seems so beautiful, and crystal clear. These days I walk on feather feet, and I am so grateful to John and his wife Carla for what they gave to me. I really want to share this with anyone who cares to listen.
You would not believe how beautiful my life is these days. Thank you for reading, all you who reached the end of this story. I hope it helps you as it most certainly helped me...
Peter Duggan - Perth, Australia - December 23, 2013
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